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AMERICAN HISTORICAL ASSOCIATION.
studiously avoiding the object's name and yet I have some h.ow or other conceived a most insiduous idea that your taste passions and character are so similar to my own and the beautiful soothing inter- esting and angelic Emily so much the favorite theme of your pen· Yes Austin I have been suspicious enough to fear that you are again my rival and that the Phoen:iz flame which has resuscitated with chastened vigour in my bosom still burns in yours and for the same object But to be plain with you I have long known and regarded E-y in a peculiar manner- When my old flame was at its zenith she was my confident and has for years been my most intimate friend. Wbat think you is the product of such intimacy-I cannot say I love her-yet I know not a perfection I must not ascribe to her- Am I sick i- worn down by toil and Marching 1 Do the chances of war threaten my dissolution j Then I think of Emily-then I look to her as on~ of the objects fate has given to attach me most strongly to life and fame- I am vain enough to say-(! boast because I prize it above nll my worldly store)-she in a small degree reciprocates my feelings- We have often acknowledged our feelings-How far my old attachment prevented me from rising fro.m the claims of a friend to a lover I cannot tell but surely I could not have gazed so long on an object of her worth without thirsting for possession were it not Austin that since I know E-a first as if the passion was baleful my other better feelings have All been swallowed m that vortex and my sensibilities for others measur- ably suspended- That I have some slight traces of affection left for her I will not cannot deny-but as it would require the un- raveiling of more circumstances than I ever expect explained to bring about a reconciliation I think no more about it only to obliterate it forever.- Of the landing of the English in this country our battle with them etc you have no doubt heard for the last 12 days our armies have been laying within sight of each other. They have twice attempted to cannonade us from our works and force them but in the end retired with loss- I led·the 44th Regt in this Action and [mutilated] had command of it. It has su:ffered severely and acquitted itself well. How long th1s state of things will remain I cannot tell- We are well fortified but not strong enough to give them a field fightr-- They have about 8,000 Regulars-- If I live through the scene I will visit Kentucky immediately afterward,-! wish much to see you a.nd would be glad to meet you
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