.THE AUSTIN PAPERS 19 There has been for the last three years • a ·painful conflfot in my own _mind, between the ideas ·and principles of abstract right which influenced many, and caused the past eJ1:citements; and what I believed to be the true policy and interest of Texas. This conflict, added to the influence which my personal friends had over me, has caused me much unhappiness, -and perhaps it has at -times given to me the appearance of wavering. I have felt for Texas as a parent feels for its only child w~en he believes it to be in danger. When viewing the subject· on this general and broad scale, such men as Chambers, Robinson [Robertson] and others, who I am told have been •trying to undermine and ruin me during my imprisonment, are entirely overlooked. I view them as the captain of a noble ship does the worms who are eating into the sides of his•vessel at a time when the waves are driving him upon a rocky shore. The greater danger absorbs the lesser. But they are notwithstanding worthy of attention-a worm hole can sink a ship. I have heretofore believed that Chambers·had acquirements and a knowledge of the Spanish language that would enable him to be useful to Texas, and for this reason I have been disposed to see him advance, and be imployed in public matters. The idea which my friends all had, that he was my personal enemy had no weight with me so long as I believed he could be of public utility. But if he has spent the last winter to intrigue at Monclova for the purpose of keeping me in prison, and of wheedling this simple Govt- out of sixty leagues of land for two years services as judge, and entangling all the upper country so that no man of common sence will settle there-if he has been doing all this, he certainly is not the man I believed him to be, and so far from serving Texas, he is calculated to do nothing but harm. I never condemn any one hastily or without evi- dence-that he has much boyish ambition and vanity I always knew, but that properly directed, I thought might be made useful to the country, after a little experience had tempered it to the standard of sound and patriotic and rational and manly ambition. When I reach Monclova I can fo1 m an opinion as to these matters, and untill then I shall suspend it. There has been too much of the ardent, impatient, and inflamatory im- petuosity of passion for the last three years in Texas, The people of the U. S. are ardent in everything, it is their national character, and what has raised that country to the unparaleled prosperity it enjoys, and Americans carry the same ardor and enterprise and love of freedom wherever they go. It is a noble trait of character, but at the same time there are situations and circumstances where Prudence dictates moderation and calmness. We are in that situation in Texas. The people of the Colony ought to sef"k their public servants amongst the most prudent men they can find-Men who have a firm and well established reputation for probity, calmness, intel- ligence, judgement and virtue. such men for example as Burnett, Grayson,
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